Posted by: Becca on: October 19, 2009
Sometimes, even when I don’t think I’m praying, God likes to jump into my conversations with myself. Kind of like the person standing behind you in line while you’re talking to whomever you’re with (loudly enough for everyone to hear), who just goes ahead and tosses in a passing comment like they were part of [...]
Posted by: Becca on: October 9, 2009
Wow, I am really irritated at the way I just had a post deleted while I was working on it. Really really irritated.
So this is going to be shorter and less involved. Because I’m irritated.
I had a dream last night. I was outdoors with a group of people I knew but couldn’t see and someone [...]
Posted by: Becca on: October 2, 2009
I hear the most from God when I am most extremely broken. The broken where you aren’t even angry, aren’t questioning, aren’t trying, aren’t asking, aren’t doing anything but being broken. But that makes sense, since that kind of broken is so extremely open.
Not that I don’t hear from God otherwise, but perhaps I am [...]
Posted by: Becca on: August 27, 2009
There’s this saying that I’m not sure if it’s somehow Bibicial, or more a Christian myth, that the harder you press to God, the harder the devil presses after you…either way…Damn if my car is not f+#@*^. I am so tired.
And all the other bills, the house, the complete lack of funding…the fear of the [...]
Posted by: Becca on: August 21, 2009
As soon as I heard this song, the first lines, I felt that this was a prayer I’ve had as well. Bonus that her vocal delivery is beautiful, throaty, soulful.
Have Your Way Lyrics by Britt Nicole
Feels like I’ve been here forever,
Why can’t you just intervene?
Do you see the tears keep falling?
And I’m falling apart at [...]
Posted by: Becca on: August 3, 2009
This is what I wrote down, word for word, during a sermon. That’s why it may or may not make sense. I just wanted it recorded, mainly for myself, (but also for anyone who likes to read my streams of consciousness…:) there’s some things I want to revisit.
Magnification, magnificence.
Clear eyes:
all the colors
and
movements
of light.
Vessel. Love Life, [...]
Posted by: Becca on: July 21, 2009
Lord, I’m tired. Too tired to move. Move me, please. Move in me, around me. Keep me safe. Keep those I love safe.
I’m tired of doing things. Do things for me. Handle things for me. Take care of things for me, I’m too tired. Weary past my heart. You do not grow weary.
I’m tired of [...]
Posted by: Becca on: May 17, 2009
As parents, the church instructs us to model the love of God through our love for and relationship with our children (and our spouses and really, ultimately, for each other all around). The reasoning is simple: in this way, our children can begin to grasp what it is to be loved by God. What it [...]
Posted by: Becca on: May 17, 2009
Sometimes, middle ground is just frustrating. Seeing every side is confusing. I guess that’s where the soundwaves come in. It’s just been so noisy lately. It knots me up, thinking about it. Everything is neverending, but I’m tired of accepting some things. I’m tired of some words I keep using. The line between content and [...]
Posted by: Becca on: April 16, 2009
I’m doubting everything I said last week. Maybe there won’t be enough. There’s so much to lose. Maybe it won’t be okay (or I won’t be okay). Maybe I can’t keep moving. Maybe I will be paralyzed. Maybe I just can’t do this again, anymore, at all. Maybe I’m a complete failure. Maybe I’ll never [...]
